Quick Hits

BOXING

Mike Tyson is making a run at a spot on the food network. He has developed some insight into how to properly eat human ears, and he's not afraid to share some tips on how to spice up your next Cannibal Friday. Ever the trailblazer in exotic fancies such as face tattoos and Broadway, Tyson declared that it would have been much better to nom on Evander Holyfield's ear had it been relished with Holyfield's own BBQ sauce. Creepy. Read more at the link.

Ear would be tastier with sauce

OLYMPICS

The Olympic trials have been wrapping up, and we've been able to see who will be representing us in London starting later in the month. Big stories are the Micheal Phelps/Ryan Lochte rivalry, track controversies surrounding Allyson Felix and Jeneba Tarmoh and a fresh batch of lady gymnasts to carry the banner that stalwarts like Shawn Johnson and Nastia Liukin helped established in Beijing. More on Liukin in a little while.

We wound up being robbed of a great one on one race between Felix and Tarmoh after the photo finish of their 100m heat came back inconclusive of who finished third. Both runners already qualified for a spot on the team in different events, and in light of such an unprecedented result you could easily expect the face off to garner a lot of attention for both ladies. However, it was not meant to be. Tarmoh gave up her spot, nixed the run off and killed our collective track and field buzz. Felix will race alongside Carmelita Jeter and Tianna Madison in the Games, and will probably make some people think of Long John Silvers in the back of their mind.

It might just be me, but doesn't she look a little like a fish? Maybe just a little??

We need to go ahead and make funeral arrangements for any of these guys planning on swimming alongside Phelps and Lochte. Just forget about it guys. You not only have to contend with the most decorated swimmer in history (Phelps' 8 gold medals from 2008 beat the total medal count of 61 other participating countries that year), but also his closest rival who won two gold medals in Beijing en route to setting a new world record? Lochte and Phelps traded wins in the trials, but both have acknowledged that it all comes down to what happens in the pool across the pond. Sounds like these two are going to be plenty motivated to beat each other, which means it's game over for all the other mere mortals.

When it comes to the gymnasts, they look good. I'm not going to act like I know the second thing about gymnastics, but there was some Youtube fodder on display by my favorite from Beijing, Nastia Liukin. Watch her dad be the worst spotter ever here:

Most of the ladies were able to avoid smashing their faces, and five were picked to go and kick all the other 15 year old asses. It seems this year we don't have the big time ringers like Liukin and Shawn Johnson from last year, which makes me think we are gonna have a harder time of it. We'll just have to see how our ladies do when they hit the big stage. Hopefully, the stage doesn't hit back like in Nastia's case.

(Side note: I'm absolutely committed to finding some way to make this year's Olympics a drinking game. We're already programmed to scream at our TVs with patriotic fervor, so why not feed the fire and raise the stakes? There is so much to work with here too! Surely a future post will address this topic, so keep your eyes open if you like the idea or have any suggestions how to make this the sloppiest Olympics ever! USA! USA!)

You can tell you're doing the game right if the picture on your screen starts to look like this

TENNIS

Since we're talking about the Olympics, two other folks we're likely to see in the games are Roger Federer and Andy Murray. The tennis stars will face off in the Wimbledon final on Sunday with both men trying to make a statement. For R-Fed, it would mark his return to the #1 ranking and show all those who have been writing him off that he still has some good play left in him. I know I certainly considered him old news with the emergence of Nadal with his man capris and Djokovic with his great nickname (The Djoker is one of the best in sports) pushing Federer to third banana status. He already put down an unfocused Djoker, and it would be a big step for him to add another trophy to his collection.

Murray's story is the exact opposite, as he has never reached the championship level the other three have obtained at some point in their career. Always considered the "other guy", a win at Wimbeldon could be a sign that he's finally ready to shake up the top three and be considered a legitimate contender for future major championships. Whereas Fed has the pressure of his legacy weighing down on him, Murray will be feeling the edge of playing on his homecourt in front of legions of his countrymen. I would always consider having the crowd on your side an advantage, until you look at the numbers: Its been over 70 years since a Brit won the tournament, he's 0-2 against Federer in major tournaments and all Murray's wins over the Swiss champ have come on a hard court. With all the hopes of his country set squarely on his shoulders, it's going to take some mental fortitude on Murray's part to make sure his performance isn't effected by all the outside influence.

Who do I think will win? Let's just say that I think it'll be the guy wearing white...

Maybe not THAT much white

This is my first post, and there should be more coming down the pike, hopefully a little faster than this one. If you like the writing, want my take on a certain topic or just feel the need to drop in your two cents, please comment! I would love to hear what people think about this same stuff